You don’t realize it but you look for it in everyone, and it keeps you up at night that you haven’t found anyone that can make you feel like he used to.
You don’t realize any of it till you meet someone new and think, oh god, maybe he could be someone that stays. The worst part is that you hardly recovered from the way the last guy tore you apart. The worst part is that it terrifies you to think that you could get attached to someone like that again, because it felt like you pinned your heart to your sleeve only for the needle to break through the skin. The idea of loving someone the way you loved him makes you sick because you never thought you’d ever have to find someone else to begin with.
You realize that no matter how many new band aids you use or how many times you try to fix it, some wounds just don’t stop bleeding.
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